Ditch the January New Years Resolutions for Selfcare and Happiness instead‍

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Happy New Year lovelies. Better late than never hey? Wishing you all a year of good health and happiness, because my word we all deserve it right?

New years usually start with “New Year New You”, and we all give ourselves tough New Years Resolutions that we break within the first two weeks of January because they are boring and they make us feel miserable, then we self-hate and it spirals into a whole world of negativity. Being on social media there is immense pressure to lose weight, look thin, eat better, drink more water, drink no alcohol, eat plant based, go to the gym, take up running etc etc. The list is exhausting just typing let alone actually doing them. In reality we need to be our own version of perfect not social medias perception. Finding inner happiness through selfcare is far more important than being someone else's version of 'perfect'.

Instead, this year I have decided to boycott the mundane New Years resolutions in search of inner happiness instead. I will not do anything that makes me feel miserable. Only doing things because I actually want to do them, things that I get joy from and not because I feel pressure to comply with others. Some days I get joy from going to the gym, other days it's from eating a whole bar of dairy milk chocolate in one go. It’s about balance and definitely no pressure.

So, I thought I would share with you some of the selfcare rituals that I have been implementing since January 1st that so far have had a positive impact on my mood and general wellbeing and in turn hopefully helping my mindset to achieve all my goals this year.

One of the main things I want to work on is my sleep. Due to my illness Fibromyalgia not only do I find it difficult to sleep I also find it hard to stay asleep waking multiple times through the night. More often than not I am awake more than I am asleep leaving me feeling unrefreshed, groggy and suffering brain fog in the morning.

Bedtime Routine

I have started a sleep routine which is working. Although I do still wake up in the night its not as frequent and I am falling asleep much easier. So here are my new sleep tools.

• I have cut out late night snacking. I was finding not only was I often getting heartburn at bedtime but the sugar (snacks are always sweet in my house) was keeping my mind from resting. Saving calories and helping me sleep.

• Sunday night to Thursday night I have a restriction on my phone where I can’t access any of my apps that would allow me to scroll from 10pm at night to 7am in the morning. This stops me from looking at my phone and scrolling periodically until I fall asleep or scrolling when I wake up. Blue light generated from your phone messes with your ability to sleep as it blocks a hormone called melatonin that makes you sleepy. It is advised to eradicate blue light 2 hours before your bedtime. I did this in my phone settings under "screen time" You can personalize your own down time from your whole phone or just certain applications. I went cold turkey and did my whole phone except for my alarm and calls.

• As I now do not have my phone to read at night I have gone back to reading before bed. I am currently reading "Confessions of a forty something f##k up". A lighthearted and relatable book about a 40 something year old lady whose engagement went down the pan, she doesn’t want children and is trying to find her way amongst all her happily married friends with kids. A very modern-day book and its enjoyable and easy to read. I actually have a whole shelf of books I have collected but not read so it is my mission this year to make my way through them. During lockdown I read a lot! as life has gotten back to normal I haven't made enough tie for reading so i do at least 20 minutes before bed.

• Whilst I am reading, I spray into the air a lovely calming mist. I am using Neom’s Scent to De-Stress luxury home mist. Blended with 24 of the purest essential oils including Lavender, Jasmine and Brazilian Rosewood. Designed to calm your mind. I love to spray it and then take a few deep breaths before I start my reading.

- RRP £22.00 - Available at neomorganics.com

• I am all about the scents and giving a spa like relaxing experience so just before bed I also pop on my diffuser with some sleepy time essential oil blends in. I am currently using –

- Tisserand Sleep Better Diffuser Oil – RRP £8.50 – get 15% off when you shop at Feelunique code NICOLAFU - HERE

- Marks and Spencers SLEEP Apothecary – RRP £6.00 for 2 bottles - available and Marks and Spencers

• My very last ritual is a pillow spray. Yes, another scent but I have actually been using every night for the best part of 3 years and its now something I cannot sleep without. The pillow mists are sleep inducing helping your mind to switch off. I have three faves that I use.

- This Works Deep Sleep Pillow Spray – RRP £19.50 – get 20% when you shop Lookfanstastic code LFTFNICOLAL - HERE

- Feather & Down Pillow Spray *– RRP £7.00 available at BOOTS, Feather & Down and Superdrugs

- Pacifica Lavender Moon Body and Pillow Mist * – RRP £12.00 available at Cult Beauty.

Journaling

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I have never ever journaled before, but it is a proven method for mood boosting. Journaling helps you to prioritise your problems, fears and concerns on a day-to-day basis helping you to identify negative thoughts and turn them into a positive. This in turn helps you to make better choices, achieve goals, gain self-confidence, find inspiration and reduce stress and anxiety.

I have been using The Six Minute Diary which has been designed for you to journal for 3 minutes in the morning and three minutes in the evening daily. The Journal is set out to have repetitive daily questions. This is deliberate as the brain gets used to repetitive actions and repetitive tasks become a habit after approximately 66 days of repetition. There are also weekly self-reflection questions and goals.

The idea of journaling, is to help you achieve your goals and aspirations through focusing on the smaller things to help with progress as well as giving you therapy that helps improve your mental state. Injecting happiness and limiting low mood. Tiny changes equal big results. The journal helps you focus on the small things in life that make you happy for example the birds snging, the food you ate, your heating, the colour of the flowers. things that made you smile that day.

I got my journal from Amazon, and it was RRP £22.99 available in a variety of colours.

Bathing

I believe 99% of my problems are resolved in the bath. Seriously lol! Baths are not just for washing dirt away, they also wash away worries, stress and fears. I have been jumping into the tub more often for an hour of relaxation. I aways, come out feeling much lighter in the mind. Not only d baths help my muscles and joints when they ae in pain through my illness they also help me relax and get rid of tension, and to file away thoughts in my mind.

Of course, if we are going to treat ourselves to a bath its got to have all the indulgence. So, I light a candle fill the bath with salts, oils or bath foams and I put on a face mask and hair mask to! Here are some of my tub time recommendations –

- Oskia Bath Salts *– RRP £68.00 available at Cult Beauty

- Nivea Relax Bath Cream – RRP £5.95 available at Amazon

- NEOM Perfect Nights Sleep Bath Foam – RRP £23.00 get 20% when you shop Lookfanstastic code LFTFNICOLAL HERE

- Elemental Herbology Oils * - £30.00 each – get 20% off with code NLONDORS

- Soak Sunday Bath Salts *- £14.00 available at Beauty Bay - HERE

- Soak Sunday Bath Oils * - £16.00 available at Beauty Bay - HERE

These are my main rituals that I have incorporated into my life so far. I have definitely felt more positive, and I am sleeping so much better. I am trying to eat better and move more but I have not put pressure on myself to do so because I think inner happiness is so much more important than being skinny or fit. Happiness comes first the rest will follow.

I hope you have enjoyed reading this rather different blog but most importantly if you want the slice of cake, eat the slice of cake!

Kisses

Nicola XXX

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